If you are like me, you haven’t heard much about life coaches until recently. Sure, you saw some guests on Oprah with some profound ideas, and you know of a few great motivational speakers. You’ve heard of Vision Boards and goal setting, you’ve read some books. But you’re not really sure what exactly a life coach is. Let me tell you!
As children, we have a teacher or a coach or a parent there to guide us in almost all areas of development. We learn and we grow under the direction of someone who has knowledge and experience. Even professional athletes, at the top of their game have a coach. Or many coaches…one for strengthening, conditioning, diet, someone to guide them through PR and interviews and so much more. Leaders have advisors, management has a team, you get the picture. Each one of us is amazing, but with a little extra guidance can find where we are really supposed to be.
That’s where a coach comes in. Life can throw challenges at us. Our brain likes to protect us from danger, but in our comfortable, safe, modern lives it can throw a bunch of thoughts at us that actually cause problems. A coach is there to help navigate this. A coach will encourage us when necessary, and call us out, too.
A life coach isn’t a therapist. Therapists tend to deal with the past, and with people who are struggling with serious issues. Listen, I had a therapist when I was pregnant with my first rainbow baby. I did not feel in control of my fears and I needed help. She was amazing and listened to everything I had to say. She taught me breathing exercises and showed me that how I was feeling was normal. I am forever grateful for that help. I still wish I would have had a coach through that time. Someone to show me a different way of approaching things. Telling myself everything would be ok when I did not believe it wasn’t enough. I couldn’t see how to choose intentionally my thoughts to create the feelings I was so desperate for.
A coach is for people who are doing well, but they want to be doing better than that. For people who excel in most areas but just can’t figure out why they are so frustrated with their spouse, their kids, their messy house, their sister-in-law. They want to be able to make and keep commitments to themselves.
You’ve been through a lot and you’ve learned a lot. You may still have wounds and questions from your loss you are ready to face. NOW is the best time. It’s the only sure thing. Byron Katie says “If you argue with the past you lose. But only 100% of the time.” She’s right.
I was so happy when I found life coaching. I thought I needed help in one area of my life, and what I learned ended up affecting everything! Having a person who can teach you about your mind and your thoughts and how to use them to make your life better is such a gift! Coaches teach you how to truly be present, and to look forward with confidence. Coaching helps you make decisions and get out of being stuck and second guessing everything. A coach is like a cheerleader who is holding up a mirror. I’m not here to tell you what to do, I’m here to help you find out the answer for yourself.
When I was making the decision to serve other women like me, I looked around. I googled. I couldn’t find more than a handful of people coaching moms who had lost babies. And you and I both know there are A LOT of us. We have all the issues most human moms have. But we also have other thoughts that hold us back and cause us pain. Even some of our thoughts that we would consider “good” like our gratitude for our Rainbow babies can cause problems when we get frustrated with those precious little ones. Like, “I should be so stinking grateful all the time, I wanted this baby so badly….what is wrong with me??” or “I should be so grateful I am pregnant, I have no right to complain or tell people how truly terrified I am.” All these SHOULDS everywhere are not helping you be who you want to be.
That’s why I’m here for you. We are going to kick those thoughts right outta your brain. I can’t wait to meet you. This is gonna be great.