Have you ever felt like you were just waiting around for fun to happen?
Or you’ve felt guilty for having fun after your loss?
Or maybe you just wish you were fun like you used to be.
Today’s episode is diving into all of this, plus we get to hear Jody’s experience of miscarriage.
Jody Moore is a Master Certified coach with a wonderful program called Be Bold. She coaches moms who are members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints.
Jody’s podcast is what introduced me to life coaching, and for that I will always be grateful.
It is such an honor to be able to share her perspective on FUN with you. Jody is an expert at creating joy and enjoyment during all that life brings us. Her perspective is unique and she shares and teaches so clearly.
I know you will love this episode.
To learn more about Jody visit:
If you have any questions, let me know here:
If you would like to share your baby’s story on the podcast, submit here: http://smoothstonescoaching.com/podcast-submissions
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Music provided by ZingDog / Pond5
Photo provided by Jody Moore
I have such a treat for you today. Some of you may have heard of Jodi Moore, others of you, this might be your first chance getting to listen to her and her amazing energy and knowledge and her heart. So Jodi is a coach for members of the Church of Jesus Christ, of Latter Day Saints, mostly moms. And that is how I found her, her podcast, is how I was introduced to life coaching and.
Things have never been the same, and I’m just so excited for her to come on and talk about. Having fun on purpose because it’s honestly something that I still need to work on, and she is such a great example of just making life a little more fun, even when things seem heavy. You can find out more about Jodi at Jody Moore coaching on Instagram or at her website, jody moore.com.
Let’s do this. Welcome, Jody. I am so excited to have you here. Thank you. I’m thrilled to be here. Thanks for having me. I like to start the podcast when I can, allowing moms to talk about their angel babies. I think, because when you lose a baby, their life and their death is so wrapped up in each other and there’s just not a ton of memories, like when grandpa passes away, you know?
Mm-hmm. So I was wondering if you would share a little bit about, um, your age old baby, and. Just any happy memories or anything that they taught you, and then kind of just a little bit about your story maybe. Okay, sure. So I, um, this was, I had two kids already. I had my, um, I. I’m trying to think how old they were.
Um, my oldest would’ve been about five, I wanna say, and then I had a, a four year old, so my first two were pretty close together. Um, my husband and I waited a little while to try having more kids after those first two because they were so close and we were really overwhelmed with that. So, um, By the, about the time, my youngest was four, we decided we wanted to have at least one more, maybe two.
And um, so we started trying to get pregnant and, um, took us a not too long, but you know, a little bit of paying attention I guess you could say. And, um, I became pregnant. Um, Pregnancies to me are not my favorite time of life. I tend to get pretty sick, especially in the beginning and just feel not like myself at like, I think most women, I know some get a lot more sick than me, but anyway, um, I, you know, everything was fine in my first doctor’s appointment, and by the time I went in for my 12 week checkup, um, I was all by myself.
My husband wasn’t with me, and the doctor said, I’m really sorry, but there’s no heartbeat. And um, so that was a hard moment, you know? Um, yeah, I. I kind of, you know, he, my doctor’s great. He had delivered, I’m trying to think if that was the doctor that had, no, he hadn’t delivered my other babies, but he, I’d been seeing him long enough that I knew him pretty well.
He is a really nice man, and, um, I’m grateful for that. Um, you know, I, he went in, he took me in and they did a quick ultrasound just to confirm. But, um, the baby wasn’t, wasn’t growing. And in fact, they think that the baby had stopped growing at about eight weeks. And so I was about 12 weeks along, so I, they scheduled a D N C for a few days later.
Um, you know, I was definitely emotional. I was crying. I called my husband and, um, and told him the news and was emotional that day. Um, But I, I think, Amy, what’s interesting for me about my experience is I didn’t feel very emotional for very long about it. I just had a lot of thoughts like this baby, I. Um, is fine.
Um, I knew that baby was fine. I knew that that baby was never gonna come full term and come be, you know, come to earth in the way that we think about, and that for whatever reason, you know, I thought, well, maybe that baby’s spirit is gonna come to me and my next baby. Sometimes I still think my, my third child, Oliver, his spirit might’ve been what was going to be living in that first body.
Um, I don’t know. Um, So I, I really was at peace with it. I really felt like, you know, the, for whatever reason this happens, this isn’t all that uncommon. And, and of course I was sad, but I also just felt like I just knew that baby was okay. And I think what was hard about it is that people expected me to be really emotional.
They wanted me to be really heartbroken, and they kept saying, And, you know, I don’t fault people at all for saying things like, are you doing okay? I would say, you know, yeah, you know what, I’m doing fine. I, I feel really at peace. But, you know, sometimes I remember one woman in particular saying to me, well, just wait.
It’ll hit you. Just wait. It’s coming. And I was just like, really? Okay. Maybe like, maybe that’s true, but I think it’s so challenging. I think as human beings, we, we tend to wanna tell each other how, how they might be feeling or how they should feel, or how we would feel, or how we did feel in that experience.
And, and it’s, I know I tend to do it to people too, whether it’s trying to help ’em feel better or telling ’em to feel worse. Um, we have best of intentions, but for me it was such a peaceful experience. I didn’t find myself in a lot of grief over it, and then I felt guilty, like, maybe that’s wrong. Maybe I should be grieving this more, you know?
Do you find that with your clients different experiences like that? Yeah, for sure. I think there’s, you know, there’s, it’s okay to not be okay and it’s okay to be okay, like to give yourself permission to say, Like, I am fine. I’m handling this, or mm-hmm. I wasn’t as sad as I thought I would be, I think.
Mm-hmm. One of the benefits of today is that there’s so much support online and you can find so many stories, um mm-hmm. But then, yeah, like you said, you kind of create this idea of how it should look like mm-hmm. To go through something. Yes. And, but it’s not always that way. And I could definitely, ’cause I’ve had a stillbirth, like a full term stillbirth and a miscarriage.
And I wouldn’t really compare them ever. I just, it’s different and that’s like, it’s a different experience. So I completely agree. I think I was pretty early on in my pregnancy. I think if I would’ve been further along or certainly a stillbirth like would be an entirely different experience. Um, But I still find myself, I don’t talk about it very much.
Like I don’t, I don’t bring it up only because it’s not something that weighs heavily on my mind, but also I still have these thoughts like, oh, I’m gonna offend somebody. Because for some people it is a very emotional, uh, experience or. Or people are gonna judge me that I’m just cold and insensitive because I didn’t feel that way.
Like I definitely still have some noise in there around the topic of it at all. And what’s interesting is my kids, you know, so my, my four and five-year-old, we had told them already that we were gonna have a baby. And so then we had to. Explain to them that we weren’t gonna have a baby quite yet and try to explain to, you know, these little kids what this means.
And, and so we just explained the baby wasn’t growing. Right. And, and, um, you know, so this hap you know, we explained this happens sometimes and that we’ll probably be able to have another baby. And anyway, we did end up having two more kids, but. It came up the other day, uh, one of my kids said something about, yeah, that baby that we didn’t have.
And I was like, oh, like I, I forgot that they even know about that. And um, but they said it in this way. Like I. We have that baby too, because I explained to them that we’ll, we’ll probably, you know, I don’t know how it works. Like I said, I don’t know if that spirit is now Oliver or what have you, but I said, well, we might get to meet that baby and raise that baby and that baby will be part of our family in the next life.
And, and the way they talk about it is so not emotional too, because that is kind of how I presented it to them. Not that it’s wrong again if they were, but it’s just like, yeah, there’s that other baby. So, I dunno. It’s such tricky stuff, man. Yeah, and I don’t fault any, I mean, there’s some people that never say it, that never even tell their kids or never tell anyone, and yes, I don’t think that that’s wrong, or you know.
Yeah. Everyone deals with it in their own way, so That’s right. I mean it for sure. It just is what it is. Yeah. So do you think that there’s any. The lesson that that baby taught you, or any little moment that you wanted to share? Yeah, I mean, like, the moment that I associate the most closely with it is one that I think you heard me talk about on the, on the fire side.
I did, um, for our turtle house. But, um, you know, again, I, I was. After that first day, I was really at peace with everything. And I can’t remember how many days after that it was when I went in for the D N C procedure. Um, and my husband went with me and I, you know, I have a, the sweetest mother-in-law who just takes such good care of me and my kids, and she was there.
Well, I mean, she lived in the same town as me and so she was, I think she stayed at home with my other kids while we went in for the procedure and um, and I came back from the procedure still feeling fine. Um, but you know, they say to rest for the day or what have you. So I went in my room and climbed in my bed to take a nap and she had changed the sheets on my bed.
She just put fresh, clean sheets on my bed and I did have this moment. I still get emotional when I talk about it, of just like, Really strong emotion and I sort of broke down crying. Just, you know, I think the emotion of everything going on, uh, with the miscarriage and just like that little simple act that my mother-in-law did that, you know, the feeling of clean sheets, um, it just felt so good and it, it to me was, you know, like, It felt like Heavenly Father just comforting me in that moment and that she thought to do that little act, um, just really meant a lot to me.
So, you know, it’s a tender experience definitely that I’m, I’m grateful for. So, yeah, I love that and I think I learned so much about service just ’cause I was. Never on the receiving end of as much service as I was when we lost Lauren. Like just so many people did so many things and I mean, it’s just a beautiful part of, of something that’s, you know, can be really hard.
So yeah, for sure. Awesome. Well let’s jump into our subject today, which Jody and I went to the same school. Jody is a few years ahead of me and amazing. And a master coach. I was really excited to have Jody on because she’s an expert in something that I maybe feel like I struggle a little bit with, which is having fun on purpose and how we do that.
And I think right now, um, even in the world, it can feel really heavy and there’s a lot going on and we kind of feel like maybe we’re not allowed to have fun or I don’t know, it just kind of. A heavy time for a lot of people and mm-hmm. Also during grief it can be a little bit confusing. So, um, I just wanted to talk a little bit about creating fun and obviously Jody, you would agree that we’re not telling people that it’s better to have fun or, you know, like any emotion is what we’re aiming for.
But if you want to have fun, if you have a point in your life or a certain relationship or situation, Or you’re just wishing yes, wish it was a little more fun, then you can create it on purpose. And yes, I actually had a little personal example. I don’t know if that would help you as you’re explaining or if you wanna just Yes.
Tell me. I wanna hear it. Okay. So we recently sold, we had a little tent trailer and we sold it ’cause we’re gonna get a bigger trailer ’cause we kind of outgrew that one. Fun I think. To myself, I love camping. Camping is awesome. I love camping as a kid, but I also have six children, and it starts to become the packing and the cooking, and the cleaning and the dirt and the nobody fall in the fire and don’t poke your sister with a, you know, marshmallow stick.
And it’s. It’s not that much fun, right? So this is a situation I have where I was like, Hey, I’ve got Jody here and if she’s gonna teach us, um, that’s just a situation where I think I really need to try harder to be more fun, to have more fun so we can enjoy those memories instead of just being, I. Bogged down in the details.
Mm-hmm. Yeah. I, um, have always been drawn to people that are really funny ’cause I’m not necessarily one of those super funny people, but I always am attracted to them. Like, even as a kid in school, I wasn’t naughty, I wasn’t getting in trouble, but I kind of liked the naughty, you know, the goof offs, if you will.
Um, because I like to laugh and I do like to have fun and. I like to have fun, especially during the times of life that feel like they’re supposed to be really serious and hard, and I’m not, you know, like you said, Amy, it’s not to say that you have to have fun, that it’s better to, or that there aren’t times when it’s totally appropriate to be in just a lot of pain, but.
I, I’ve heard people say before, well, sometimes it’s just not appropriate to be laughing and having fun, and, and I don’t know that I agree with that. I think as long as it feels appropriate to you right, then it is. Okay. And I’ve certainly had those experiences where, you know, maybe there’s, like you said, maybe there, there’s something serious, like we’re grieving something.
Okay. Like the loss of a baby would be a great example. And that grief is, and those emotions are gonna be present for a lot of the time, but your brain can only handle living in that state for so much, and then it needs a little break from it, right? Even when you’re in the thick of grief, I would say. And so when you find, I notice a lot of people and myself, when we find ourselves in those moments of feeling happier, feeling joy, feeling relief, not feeling the heaviness of the grief, almost like maybe not even thinking about the topic for a moment.
A lot of people then feel bad like. Oh, I wait. I shouldn’t be feeling happy right now. I shouldn’t be feeling joy. I should keep the heaviness of the grief. Or they make it mean something, right? Yeah. Negative about themselves, which I don’t think is useful at all. I don’t think it’s necessary and appropriate for you to stay in a heavy, grieving, serious place.
Um, I think your brain needs a break from it, and it’s a healthy thing to step away from it for as long as you. Feel inclined to, I’ve experienced this even when it’s like, oh, there’s people in my family suffering and struggling and I’m over here just enjoying myself and then all the guilt like I shouldn’t be.
Which is so funny, right? Because if we think about it, me feeling terrible and guilty doesn’t lift their burdens, but it feels important for some reason to suffer when people we love are suffering. Right. Have you experienced this in your coaching at all? Yes, absolutely. Yeah, just a lot of guilt. What do you tell your clients in that situation?
I’m curious. I think you do catch yourself, right? Like that first time you’re laughing or if you’re, um, yeah, just having fun. I think a lot of times what they make it mean is that they’re losing that connection with their baby, right? And so that’s really, Painful because that pain seems to be the connection with your child or the relationship with your child, and just Yes.
Letting them know that really it isn’t, right. Like you get to decide your relationship, you get to find that relationship. Yeah. Yeah. And so I think that’s, that’s a tough one for a lot of people. Yeah. Yeah, for sure. But you know, the other thing I’ll say about having fun specifically is, um, I, I used to always tell that story of like, I just, like I said in the beginning, I like funny people.
I like to have fun. I look for those people that are fun and I still am attracted to those people that view the world in that way, but, I also now have realized that I can have fun. It’s my job to make it fun. If I wanna have fun, it’s nobody else’s job. And um, that’s on me a hundred percent. So, you know, my kids, for example, will go to like some activity or to a friend’s house or whatever, and they come home and what do we always say?
Was it fun? Did you have fun? Right? And I noticed that, and I started changing my verbiage to Did you choose to have fun? Did you make it fun? Um, because I think we get this message over, over again that activities are fun or people are fun, or things are fun, and then that means other things are not. And I just like to know that I won’t always choose fun and that’s okay, but it’s always my choice.
I am the one that creates my own fun. Uh, you know, we use this a lot in regards to big goals that we wanna set too. Like if I, when I went to build my business, what Brooke Castillo, what I kept hearing her say when I hear her coach, people on business was, why aren’t you having any fun? And I was like, oh yeah, this is supposed to be fun.
And it could be fun, right? Like doing hard things, figuring stuff out, falling on your face and failing all of it. Like let’s keep some perspective and have fun with it along the way. Or else why are we even doing it? If the journey isn’t fun, then it’s not like the destination is gonna suddenly feel like you’ve arrived somewhere.
You’ve gotta have fun along the way. Yeah, absolutely. And I love that with kids. You know, little kids, they definitely can make fun anywhere. But I was thinking when I was getting ready about this, about my teenagers who right now have lots of opinions about what is fun and what isn’t fun. Yes. Um, and so I think as we get older, yeah.
We kind of forget that. We can make anything fun that we want to. So I love the way you explain that. Yeah. Well, in the teenage brain, I’m so fascinated by, because, um, I think as we, as we get to be age 12 to 16, 17 is when we start seeing the world differently. It’s sort of an evolution. Like same thing that when you go from a baby to a toddler, your brain evolves so much that toddlers can be difficult because they start realizing, wait, I can do some things on my own and maybe I want to, and I don’t have to just do what mom says and right.
And the same thing happens in a different way. For teenagers. They get this new feeling of independence. And so with both of those evolutions of the brain, I think comes a huge influx of negativity. Like, as you become more aware, it’s natural for the brain to also become more aware of what it doesn’t like and what’s wrong.
And um, I’m notice noticing that with my kids who are becoming teenagers now too, is like, oh, look at all this. Look at all the negative thoughts and negative comments and just like what’s not cool, what’s not fun, what they don’t like about school, what this teacher did wrong. It’s like a barrage of negativity.
So I try to just observe it and offer to them a new perspective every now and then, but also know that they have to wrestle with this stage. They have to go through this stage and it’s okay, and it’s a normal like developmental. Phase for sure. And definitely mom telling them that they can just make anything fun, doesn’t, they don’t love that feedback, so they don’t wanna hear that.
No, they don’t. But I still say it sometimes. Yes, absolutely. We, we’ll keep reminding them. Yes. What would you say are maybe just like a few steps that you can do to create fun no matter like where you are? If you want something to be more fun, what were maybe a couple of steps that we can take to really practice doing that?
Hmm. That’s a good question. So, first of all, I love when I catch myself becoming too serious or making something too heavy that I don’t want to be heavy, that I don’t think it’s necessary for it to be heavy. I love to ask myself the question, how could I make this more fun? I think it’s a really valuable question.
You know, if I’m gonna be doing chores, cleaning the house all day, I always ask myself, how am I gonna make it more fun? I’m gonna put in some music on my AirPods. I’m gonna have a Diet Coke while I do it. Something like that. Right? It’s gonna make it more fun. Um, so I think that’s a great question. Um, I also think it requires taking a step back from whatever you’re doing and noticing, and this is where working with a coach can be so powerful because noticing.
Where you are adding so much meaning to things that isn’t really necessary. So for example, right now, the main goal I’m working on is, is weight loss. I wanna lose 20 pounds. Okay? So I’ve tried to lose 20 pounds before and I actually tried to lose 10 pounds and I did, and then I gained back 20 after that.
So, um, this isn’t like new thing for me as a 45 year old woman, but what’s different for me this time is how much fun I’m having with it. A part of that is, again, asking myself that question, how do I make it more fun? But second of all, I’ve over the last two years, worked so hard to detach. The meaning that I used to have to the end goal.
So in other words, I used to think when I’m just 20 pounds lighter, then I’ll be better. Then I’ll love myself more, I’ll be more confident. I’ll just feel better about myself. And I’ve worked really hard to show myself that’s not necessarily true and that I can feel better and be confident in all of that right now.
And so because it’s, there’s not like this heavy, like I have to do it or else I can just have fun with it. Um, it, it’s lighter now. It’s like an experiment. It’s like a puzzle. Let’s see if I can fit this puzzle together. Let’s see if I can figure out my body and food and not be too hungry and, and tolerate a little bit of discomfort though.
And like all of those things are like a puzzle that I’m having fun with the process because I’ve done so much work to detach myself from the end goal. So I think that’s really important. Um, even when it comes to like our kids, for example, if I’m parenting and I’m disciplining my children or what have you, that starts to feel heavy and serious and frustrating.
And when I step back and go, wait a second, let’s take a step back. Let’s take a look at what’s really going on here, which is, I have kids. Awesome. I always wanted kids, right? And I love these kids even though they’re driving me crazy. I love them and. I’m just being the mom here and I’m, you know, I’m gonna make some rules, but they’re gonna break them.
And none of this has to be so heavy. I don’t have to mean it, make it mean that they don’t respect me, that they’re not good kids, whatever it is. I can just have fun with this. What would make it more fun? So, It’s kind of the way I think about it. And I think I shared on Instagram your, your podcast, what was it like 10 things you don’t Have to be angry to do or, yes.
Yeah. Loved, I loved it. It’s called Anger Not Required. Right. And it was just you, like you don’t have to be angry to do it. Right. Like mind blowing to me. Yeah. Just. Getting curious and opening up to, huh? This doesn’t have to be so we just don’t have to be grouchy about some things. It could be fun to, that’s right.
Yeah. Discipline your kids. We don’t think about that very often. And it feels so important to be upset about it. Like just this morning I let my, um, four year old play on my phone. She’s playing a game and then the six year old comes along and he wants to turn on the phone. Phone, of course. So he’s kind of peering over her shoulder and then she’s bugged that he’s in her face and that they’re just like back and forth.
And I tried a couple times to intervene and they just still kept back and forth, back and forth. So I was finally, you know what? And now I notice my brain wanna be like, ah, Why can’t they just get along and why can’t, like wants to get irritated, but I don’t wanna start with it that way, and it’s so not necessary.
It’s such a little thing, right? So I was just like, oh, guess what? Mom gets the phone now. Because that’s what happens when you guys don’t get along and they’re both upset and they’re mad. And they’re pouting and they’re whatever. And I’m just like, yeah, mom’s gonna listen to a podcast. Now I get the phone and I just have to remind myself, not that I’m mocking them, but I in my head, right.
I’m just like, this is fun though. So, yes. That’s how I think about it. Yeah, and I love that. That just reminded me of one of the things that I first learned from you, which was like, other people can be angry, other people can be frustrated, and I don’t have to be That’s right. So I mean, that was just like, that’s changing, right?
What? Yeah. Nobody, why didn’t anyone tell me this? That like, right. You can be over here having fun and, and things are going on all around you. We don’t have to mirror. The other emotions of the people we’re, we’re dealing with or, that’s right. Whatever. So, so good. And again, I highly recommend for anyone listening that you hire Amy or hire a coach to help you do that because it sounds like, oh yeah.
But actually doing it in real life is, it just takes a little practice and it takes someone showing you what you’re not seeing in yourself. So don’t feel bad if you can’t do it on your own. Just get a little help. Yeah, I love that. So I have a question about, a little bit about. Identity crisis that sometimes people have.
Like I hear people say in my clients, and you know that, you know, I used to be fun. Mm. And then this thing happened to me like I lost my baby. Or like mm-hmm. Now I’m a different person. I’m not how I used to be, and there’s kind of two parts to why this is a problem or why this is painful, right. Is because we’re.
We’re kind of resisting the reality of we’re not the same person, right? But we still want to be. Um, but then, yeah, just this idea that like, life will never be as fun as it used to be, or I’ll never enjoy things. I used to. So what would you say to someone who brought that to you for coaching? Mm-hmm. Well, I think what I would point out is that, um, the way we experience the world and the way we think about ourselves and how we show up in the world, what, like, kind of what you’re describing is a choice.
Okay. Now it feels like it’s just happening to us. It feels like I just am this way now after going through this experience. And I used to be a different way. And so I always like my clients to recognize first of all, that, um, the way you feel is because of the way you’re thinking. And that is always a choice you get to make.
And it’s not to say that you will always choose it consciously or that you would even want to always choose to feel happy. So, um, that’s important to clarify, but when we talk about ourselves that way, like, I’m just afraid I’ll never be. Fun again like I used to be or I’ll never be this way. It’s as though we’re just like waiting to see what’s gonna happen, who we’re gonna be, and how we’re gonna feel, and we, we delegate the accountability for our emotions.
We lose all of the authority to choose it. So that’s the first thing I would teach them. The second thing though that I think is really important in this type of a question is to notice the focus on the past. Right versus the future. So every, anytime we wanna go back to our past selves, like I, I wanna be fun like I was, I’d like to weigh what I used to weigh in college, or I’d like to, you know, feel the way I did about myself back then, or even like in marriage counseling when they say, let’s go back and remember all the reasons you fell in love with each other when you first got married.
I personally don’t find that to be useful because. We don’t want you to go back to that version of you. I know it sounds appealing, but the truth is, there’s so many things about you now that are so much better and that serve you so well, things that you understand, things that you, uh know, things that you’ve experienced, like the person you’ve become.
I guarantee you. Is serving you better than going back to that old version of you. And if you want to bring some of that fun with you from the past, you can, but I think it’s making peace with like an experience, like losing a child is going to change you for sure, but let’s let it change you. In time. If you are conscious and intentional about it, it’s gonna change you for the better.
We don’t want you to go back to that old version of you. We want you, like you went through something and, and you’re still going through probably something so hard. Let’s use that for your good. Let’s not try to throw it out. Because obviously we can’t, first of all, but second of all, so much better to decide who do I wanna be now.
And if you wanna bring some of that fun that you know is within you, I’m all for it. But we don’t ever wanna go back to the past, trust me. We wanna just move forward to the future. Yeah, I think that’s really, really good to remember. And. I totally agree because every time we’re resisting the past and especially resisting, you know, it’s just like, it’s impossible.
So I think embracing, yeah, you know, whatever you wanna call it. The new you. Well, it’s like Byron Katie says, when you argue with reality, you lose, but only every time. Yes. And so when we argue with like, I don’t want this thing to have happened, or I don’t want to be this way now we’re only, we’re gonna lose every time.
And so the alternative is like, oh, this is called being a human, having a human experience. And I want to have a full human experience. I want it to refine me in the way that I know that I can. And that’s gonna include. Fun and pain and um, you know, I think that sometimes those two things even happen side by side.
Like you said, what we’re experiencing in our world right now. I gotta find, there’s this quote I read yesterday on Instagram that was so good. I gotta find it. Um, but I think right now in our world, we’re experiencing the contrast of that because there’s a lot more pain and fear and worry. Okay, so this is, um, By Steven Choki and from, uh, perks of Being a Wildflower.
And it says, so this is my life and I want you to know I am both happy and sad, and I’m trying to figure out how that could be. And I think that is such a beautiful description of the human experience. It’s both happy and sad, and that’s what makes it so rich. Yeah. I just, I love all that you’ve taught us today about having fun on purpose and that it’s possible.
I think even starting with that, I love just little baby step thoughts, like maybe it’s possible that I could have fun folding the laundry, right? Or anything like that. I would just offer to everyone listening to just wiggle it around and see if. If you even think it’s possible. Mm-hmm. And just allow yourself to, to do that, I think is the first step.
Yeah. Um, and if you’re a little bit farther along and awesome fun, like Jody, then you can just take it to the next level. ’cause Jody, I love seeing you in person. I think you are really funny. Oh, thanks. Um, is there any last. Message you would wanna tell people that are listening before we say goodbye? Um, just I guess like, I just feel I.
So much love for anyone that’s struggling and that’s in the midst of grief or whatever’s going on. Um, I think be compassionate with yourself. Um, be kind to yourself. It’s so important that you do that whether you’re, again, you know, struggling and in, in the dark times, or you’re. Wanting to have fun and you’re feeling lighter.
Compassion for yourself is always the first step, and um, from that place you get a lot of awareness and you can, you know, become the person that you wanna be. But I just think we’re so hard on ourselves and if I could like change the world in one way, I would wanna help everybody just be kinder to themselves.
So that would be my parting thoughts. Yeah. I love that. That just reminded me of, maybe it was you, um, that said, you know, don’t use thought work against yourself. So anyone listening who’s like, oh, I, I should be more fun. Like just, that’s not what we’re saying here. Yeah. We’re not Watch out for those shoulds and just knowing, yes.
Yeah, you’re doing perfect the way you are, but if you want to have a little more fun, like it’s totally available to you, give yourself permission to, yeah, exactly. Yeah. I love it. Well, thank you so much, Jody. Yes. Thanks for having me. She is the best, right, and I am so grateful that she was able to open up and share her story about her miscarriage and just how she dealt with it.
And I just want you guys to always know that there is no wrong way to grieve however you’re dealing with your loss. That is the exact right way that you’re supposed to deal with it, and I think that being confident and owning it is so important and Jodi is a great example of that. So I just want to thank you guys for listening.
I hope you love this episode. I, I hope to bring you lots more goodness. If you love it, will you share it with a friend who might need this episode? And if you have a minute, will you leave a rating or a review on the podcast? It’s super simple and really quick, but it means so much to me to know if you guys are learning and the podcast is helping you.
And if you need a little more help than the podcast can give you, like Jody said, There’s things that it’s really hard for us to see without a coach, and that’s why I’m so grateful that I have a coach, actually more than one coach, just to help me see the blocks that I can’t see on my own. So I’d love to help you with that if you have something.
That you need help with, you can find me on Instagram, amy dot Smooth Stones Coaching, or my website is smooth stones coaching.com and I love to hear from you. So you can write to me anytime there or DM me, and I hope you guys have a great day and. Have a lot of fun. Just try it, experiment with it, see what you can.
Make fun this week and I will talk to you next time.