I want you to think about what Unconditional Love means to you.
Most of us think that is requires sacrifice and should only be expected of saints.
Like, Mother Theresa can love people unconditionally, but probably not me.
But I’m going to tell you how unconditional love is a gift to you can give yourself. It will make your life easier, not harder!
LOVE FEELS GREAT.
We would all pick love one hundred percent of the time if we could, right?
Guess what? You can!
The thing is, when we dislike someone, we are the ones who feel those feelings, not them. For example: if I get frustrated because someone cuts me off in traffic and I think that’s a total jerk move, I am the one who feels the anger and frustration. They have no idea. They probably didn’t even notice us, which might be why they cut us off. And they drive on just fine. I, on the other hand, get to feel grouchy every time I think about what happened for the rest of my day.
Another example could be your mother in law. If she makes a comment about your house and you make it mean something about you and something about her and all the mind drama blows up from there….you are the one who is suffering.
We act like we don’t have a choice in this, because how people behave controls our feelings.
“if he would just speak my love language, then I would feel more connected.”
“She said something about my sink full of dishes and made me feel like I’m never good enough.”
“ Tyler is making terrible choices and not going to college, I am so upset!”
This is how our human brains work! It’s easier to blame others for our feelings. I’m telling you though, you can choose to feel love towards people no matter what they do!
All you have to do is choose loving thoughts towards them. You have total control.
You are probably thinking this is easier said than done. That’s because you have been practicing this way of thinking for a long time. Your brain thinks it needs to protect you by looking for danger all the time. Except your MIL’s words aren’t actually dangerous.
Think about someone in your life right now who is hard to love.
Take a minute and answer these questions. It’s really powerful if you write them down, but you can also just think about them.
Why are they hard to love? List ALLLLL the reasons. (most of these will be thoughts, not facts even though they feel like facts)
What thoughts are preventing you from loving them more?
What does it feel like when you’ve chosen not to love this person?
And this is the big one:
What would it feel like to love this person without conditions?
Now, of course this doesn’t mean that we allow abuse or mistreatment of any kind. You can love someone and choose not to be with them. It doesn’t even mean you have to agree with them or like the things they do. It does mean that you can let the person be human. And you can let yourself be human too.
A really powerful example of unconditional love is you and your angel baby. We as adults often get caught up in needing people to act a certain way so we can love them. But when you saw that pregnancy test and those two little lines you loved that tiny person immediately.
Just because they existed. And no matter how long he or she was with you, you got to feel that unconditional love. No expectations, no rules. And you love them now, even though they are not physically with you.
What if you looked at the people around you and chose to feel that kind of love every day?
Just try it.
Love is a powerful thing.